In his book Consolations, the poet David Whyte defines heartbreak as unpreventable, the natural outcome of caring for people and things over which we have no control. He says that heartbreak begins when we are asked to let go but cannot. Heartbreak is how we mature.

He recommends we look for and befriend it because it is unavoidable. There is no alternative path.

Whyte’s description of the word is truthful and empowering. It moves the word from a position of weakness and frailty to one of somberness, respect, and acceptance. Knowing you’ve reached such a point means that what has asked you to let go is truly meaningful, and your love is real because only such conditions would result in heartbreak.

I also like that it can take so many forms: children, work, arts, and relationships.